Me: Ummmm Grace, what's on the back of your dress?
Grace: What?
Me: On your dress....is that poo or marmite?
Grace: I'm not telling Mama.
Me: Seriously Grace, which is it?!?
Grace: How bout you come find out Mama!!!
Me: Oh lord Grace, do I have to?
Grace: Yes Mama, part of being a parent is playing Russian roulette with brown stuff.
Me: Can't you just tell me?
Grace: No Mama.
I tentatively go over to check.
Me: It's marmite isn't it.
Grace: I sat on my toast.