Every night after you have gone to bed, I put your toys away and set things up differently so you will have an adventure finding new toys to play with in the morning.
Every night, at midnight and 3am I go into your room and cover you up. I whisper "I love you" in your ear and tell you are special, smart and magnificent.
I can't give up the baby monitor yet, because I still need to listen to you breathe.
Each morning I try delaying leaving for work so I can see you face before I go.
On the mornings you want to "help" me put on my make up and put on yours with me, my heart sings that you want to be close to me.
Every day we are apart, I ache deep in my heart.
I struggle at times with being a good parent, as part of me wants to give you everything you want but I know that I have to say no and be the bad guy in your eyes at times in order to raise you right.
Every time Dad sends me a photo of you while I'm at work, I struggle to resist showing everyone around me.
When you climb on my knee for a cuddle, I feel I know my place in the universe.
Each time you call for Daddy instead of me, my heart breaks a little although I know you don't mean to hurt me.
Each time you say "Mum Mum" makes me feel complete, even if you are only yelling it to get me to pick up your bunny that you have dropped.
I keep going to swimming lessons because for 30 min each week we are skin to skin and I can surround you with my arms and my love without you wriggling away.
I'm don't really get mad when we bring you into our bed if you wake at 3am when you are sick or sad, because I love you lying next to me and I love bringing you comfort.
You'll never know how much I love you until you are looking at your own child and wondering how God can be so good.
